She wants to feel you as Shiva~

“Every moment of your life is either a test or a celebration. The same is true about every moment with your woman, only doubly so. Not only is her simple existence a test for you, but one of her deepest pleasures in intimacy is testing you, and then feeling you are not moved off course by her challenge.

The most erotic moment for a woman is feeling that you are Shiva, the divine masculine: unperturbable, totally loving, fully present, and all-pervading. She cannot move you, because you already are what you are, with or without her. She cannot scare you away, because you already penetrate her in fearless love, pervading her heart and body. She cannot distract you, because your one-pointed commitment to truth will not bend to her wiles. Feeling this hugeness of love and freedom in you, she can trust you, utterly, and surrender her testing in celebration of love.

Until she wants to feel you as Shiva again. And then the testing will begin anew. In fact, it is precisely when you are most Shiva-like that she will most test you.”

~David Deida

Conscious Sex ~

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If men understood the value of a well fucked woman they would have no choice but to prioritise their sexual evolution.

If you understood that having a well fucked woman on your side was the formula to succeeding in life, in every realm and every kingdom it would become your religion.

Religiously giving her everything you’ve got, on your knees thrusting in prayer, hymns flowing from her hips to her lips a gospel choir conducted by your conductor, symphonies as sweet as an angels breath written by your caress.

Taking her deeper than the material, the mundane, the physical, undressing her body mind and soul, she is your ticket to success.

The most valuable asset you could ever invest in, your embodied evolution, your sexual consciousness.

She will ooze all over your existence , lusciously dripping warm and melting, lubricating your life, the ease within your flow, the lakshmi to your abundance, the magic behind your power.

A moisturised life, gleaming in the glory of her erotically charged radiance,

The remedy to your everything, a slathered on saviour, the coconut oil of the human variety.

Apply liberally.

Her creative energy that you have assisted in its activation, stirred up within her cauldron, will birth your every dream into reality.

Your conscious cock is like a wizards wand, interacting with her magic to manifest,  co-creating a new world with every breath, pulse and moan.

You have the power to be the god she calls her own. Taking her to heights most holy upon sweaty sheets.

You can be the moon to her tides, eclipsing her preoccupation with the mind.

You can blow the wind into her sails and lift her up high to explore the oceans of the skies, the power in your body vibrating, attuned, refined.

Divorcing her from unconsciousness & reuniting her with the divine, helping her become clarified.

Taking her into timeless trance states where her body lay beneath your own, yet her psyche is in another dimensional time zone, reciting the lyrics straight from gods kiss, a lyrical psychic physicist, delivering wisdom straight from creations mind back in her body for dinner time.

You can be a part of miracles like that on the daily if you desire.

When you heal one of us you heal us all.

Conscious sex is medicine and we are all suffering from our unfilled prescriptions.

We have become diseased from a lack of connection, from ourselves, from each other, from the earth, from the feminine.

Now is time for our reclamation.

If you are into transformation and ignoring your sexuality you are sorely mistaken, our evolution relies on our full bodied and soul integration.~

~Alana Louise May

 

Excerpts from: http://alanalouisemay.com/blog/2016/12/14/conscious-cock-is-medicine

Tantric Lingam Massage~

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In Tantra, the penis is called the Lingam, which in Sanskrit can be translated as “Wand of Light.” A big part of Sacred Sexuality is learning to love the penis and not be afraid of it.

In Tantra, we connect with our partner on a personal level. We also connect with the universal sexual chi or energy that is in our partner’s body as an energetic life force. One way to do this is through the lingam massage. Yes, this is a fancy name for a hand job. But it’s done with more thoughtfulness, respect, care, and desire to bring selfless pleasure to your partner.

Unlike your average hand job, the lingam massage involves not only massaging and stroking the penis but can also incorporate more advanced techniques, including the testicles, perineum, and the Sacred Spot (aka the prostate) as well.

Lingam is the Sanskrit word for penis and loosely translates to “wand of light.” In Tantra philosophy, we approach the lingam, or penis, from a place of the utmost love and respect, the same way we approach the yoni, or vagina. By bringing a partner pleasure through his “wand of light,” we are filled with that same energy or light in a conscious exchange of energy in giving and receiving pleasure.

Lingam massage is a practice that truly honors a man. We do it to give him pleasure. There is also a tremendous amount of sexual energy or chi in a man’s penis. Learning how to stimulate and circulate it is very powerful.

When I went to India to study Tantra and yoga, I was shocked at first to see statues of the Shiva lingam that represented the God Shiva. For most people, it represents a state of meditation. But for ancient Tantric practitioners, this held a secret meaning: that this powerful God energy was in the man’s body but especially in the penis, which contains the most masculine essence concentrated in one place.

So, to truly have sacred sex, you need to approach the man’s body as a temple and his penis as the most holy place of all.

This isn’t about having one orgasm and being done. Instead, it’s about trying to feel more and more pleasure that will become waves of multiple orgasms throughout the massage.

Here’s how to perform a lingam penis massage on your partner.

For men who want to use this for sacred practice for masturbation and energy cultivation, follow the same instructions yourself.

1. Get him relaxed.

Have your partner lie on his back wherever he is most comfortable. He might like a pillow under his head and/or under his hips. His legs should be spread apart with his knees bent, so you have easy access to all parts of his genitalia. Remind him to breathe deeply. This will assist in a deeper relaxation.

2. Remember to breathe.

Breathing is what separates Tantra from regular sex. While you give your partner the lingam massage, remember to breathe the Bliss Breath: to receive his energy of arousal and pleasure on the inhale and send him loving energy on the exhale.

This special breathing will bring you three benefits:

1. You’ll have a deeper feeling of worship or meditation and mindfulness.

2. It will make you more empathetic to his thoughts and feelings.

3. It will heighten your sexual intuition—you’ll be more aware of what your partner wants without him having to ask.

3. Encourage your partner to breathe deeply.

Before you start the lingam massage, tune into your partner by engaging in the bliss breath together. Just taking a few breaths at the same time will put you both at ease and match your bio-rhythms. While you give him the massage, keep reminding him to breathe deeply, relax, and receive all the good feelings.

4. Lubricate and massage around the penis.

Use your favorite massage oil (I prefer coconut oil because it smells yummy) to oil the shaft of the penis and his testicles. Start by sliding your hands up and down his thighs before getting to the good stuff. This will also make him feel more relaxed. Compliment him on something you like about what you’re seeing and touching.

Move onto the testicles. Gently, slowly massage them. You can use your fingernails gently on his testicles, or pull them slightly. You can also cup them in your hands and fondle them in the palm of your hand.

Massage the area around his testicles and penis (i.e., the pubic bone in the front, the inner part of his thighs, and his perineum—or taint—which is the area between the testicles and the anus).

Be careful with the balls. Men differ greatly as to the kind of touch they like. Some men are more sensitive or ticklish than others. It’s OK to ask him how he likes them touched before you start, or even as you start fondling them.

5. Massage the shaft.

Once you’ve teased the areas around the penis and he’s clearly wanting more, move to the shaft of the penis. Vary your grip from harder to lighter. Vary your stroke sequences between straight up and down and a twisting motion.

Vary the action from one hand to two hands. When using just one hand, alternate between using the right hand and the left hand.

Vary the speed from slow to fast. Start slowly and build up to a faster pace, then take it back to a slow speed again. Keep alternating the pressure, speed, rhythm, and methods.

Also, alternate the shaft strokes to start from the root of the shaft all the way up to the head. Once at the head, you can either continue the straight up and down motion, or you can do the twist—going from the root of the shaft and stopping just below the tip of the penis.

Variety is the key here.

When using two hands, you can do it a few different ways:

1. Both hands hold the penis in the same direction with the fingers pointing the same way.

2. One hand holds the penis facing one way and the other hand faces the other way.

3. Both hands move up and down at the same time. Oil is your friend here. It helps create a smoother, gliding motion.

4. The bottom hand moves up and down while the top hand does a swirling/twisting action at the tip of the penis.

6. Don’t let him climax. Keep him at the edge of orgasm.

By now, he might be very worked up and might want to come. If you are paying close attention to his breathing, how his body is moving, and his moaning, you should be able to predict if he’s nearing orgasm.

When you see him at that edge, pull back on what you’re doing, or just slow it down and remind him to breathe and ride the wave of orgasmic feelings he’s experiencing.

He might go from being rock hard to semi-hard. Don’t worry. That’s what’s supposed to happen.

7. Stimulate the sacred spot externally.

The Sacred Spot is the prostate, which is a walnut-size gland located between the bladder and the penis. When stimulated properly, it is very pleasurable for men.

You can access the prostate either internally (by inserting your fingers or a prostate massage sex toy into the anus) or externally (through massaging the outside without penetration).

If your man isn’t experienced with prostate massage, start externally. To find the sacred spot, look for an indentation somewhere between the size of a pea and a walnut midway between the testicles and the anus. Push gently inward. Be careful to go slowly and let him guide you in terms of pressure.

When you hit the right spot, massage it by pushing in with your fingers or knuckles, then backing off and pushing in again. You can also use a circular massage motion. If he’s especially hairy, use more oil so you can get to the area more easily. Or better yet, ask him if you can shave him for easier access.

8. Stimulate the sacred spot internally.

Ask your man if he’s interested in taking the prostate massage to the next level with an internal massage. If he’s game, you’ll want to loosen up his anus with massage oil. Start by massaging the outside of the anus with your fingers in a slow, smooth, and gentle circular motion. Don’t insert a finger without his permission. Ask if he’s ready for more.

If he is ready for insertion, make sure his anus and your fingers are oiled up. Make sure your nails don’t have any jagged edges. Start by inserting just the tip of one finger at first. Wiggle it back and forth to loosen him up. Once he’s comfortable with that, you can insert your finger(s) more deeply, as the prostate is about 2 to 3 inches inside the anus, closer to the anterior wall of the rectum.

Once there, you can gently caress it by moving your finger from side to side, up and down, or “milking” it with a come hither motion with your finger(s). Ask him how he’s doing as you go. Let him lead.

Prostate massage can sometimes be difficult to do with fingers, which is why so many sex toy companies now sell prostate massagers that you can use when you’re ready to take it to the next level.

9. End the massage.

To end the massage, you can allow him to climax with an ejaculation orgasm or move onto intercourse. If he is practicing semen retention, you can have him hold all his juices as he learns to transmute the orgasm from the genitals into whole body energy orgasms.~

~Psalm Isadora
http://www.mindbodygreen.com/0-25591/yes-men-can-have-multiple-orgasms-heres-the-tantric-technique-thatll-make-it.html

 

Higher Sexual Consciousness~

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The path to awakened Shakti (sacred feminine life-force) will nearly always necessitate purification and vibrational ascension of the sexual energy within you.

True feminine sexual power is an alchemical, frequency-altering natural force that can influence consciousness on earthly and cosmic levels. When feminine sexuality is in full flow: embodied, accepted, trusted, openly expressed and owned without shame or guilt, divine shifts occur within a woman, her partner, and the entire universe.

Such is the power of a high-vibrationally attuned female sexuality, that some form of clearing or transformative experiences around this issue are usually part of the feminine ascension pathway.

When Kundalini energy begins to stir at the Root Chakra, it triggers specific healing forces that begin to work around any sexual blocks or restrictions present. This can lead to varying experiences that are all designed to clear and heal anything that is obstructing the highest natural flow of sacred sensual vibration.

If you are at this place in your spiritual journey, the Universe facilitates whatever is needed to best prepare you for holding and channelling much higher sexual frequencies in your body and chakras.

This can manifest in a myriad of ways: periods of celibacy, sexual therapy, receiving loving and healing touch in safe spaces, identifying and working through past experiences of abuse or violation (can be from past lives), examining emotional patterns and intimacy issues and so on.

It is very common to be drawn at this time to Tantra and sacred sexual practices, or any arena or body of learning that supports awareness of Spirit through Sex.

Many women who are now being actively called into Divine Service of the Goddess have practiced sacred sexual activities at a very high level in past incarnations. It is this memory of channelling extremely high, healing and ecstatic vibrations through sexual arousal and intimacy that is being re-stimulated.

Fully awakened divine feminine sexual power is phenomenally creative, healing and transmutative. It builds a bridge between the temporal and spiritual worlds – aligning hearts, minds and bodies with the Goddess through rapturous sacred union.
Many women have been called onto the path of higher sexual consciousness in recent years, and many more will continue to be drawn to this purifying initiation into the Divine Alchemy of Sacred Sex.

In this way, the Universe unleashes on the world a team of highly-qualified spiritual teachers in the form of awakened, empowered females – gifting the Earth with their ancient, radical sexual wisdom.

Trust that the Universe knows exactly what you need for your re-initiation into the role of Sexual Priestess, drafted in to bring great transformation through conscious sensual pleasure.

Your sexuality is imbued with wisdom, power, strength, unconditional love and acceptance.

The Divine Feminine sexual nature is holy medicine for the planet. Healed into Wholeness, a woman initiated into her radical, powerful sexual being is a monumental Gift to the Earth.

~Sophie Bashford

www.sophiebashford.com

Listen to Your Heart~

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Listen with your heart~

Infatuation is easy, intimacy is hard. In the middle of a disagreement, so many people wait for their turn to speak, instead of really listening to their partner. Years of history can bubble to the surface in an instant.

The need to be right can be deafening and blinding, and sometimes people dig their heels in so deeply there’s no hope for honest communication. As if it’s a fight, and their partner is their opponent, and the object is to win.

But a relationship is not a game, and there are no winners when you and the person you love are in pain. You protect your ego, or you protect the relationship. If you want to truly love, that requires your vulnerability, and it takes guts to be naked like that.

So many people confuse love with control and manipulation. But love is about acceptance and a celebration. That doesn’t mean there won’t be things to work on, because of course there will. It just means that you see people as they are, and you accept them and celebrate them, while also loving yourself.

If you keep nurturing a real connection, doing those things simultaneously, that is, loving your partner and also making sure you’re honouring yourself will be natural.

There’s so much beauty in true partnership, but it takes effort. For whatever reason, that part doesn’t get covered in the fairy tales or the romantic comedies.~

~Ally Hamilton

Excerpt from: http://www.mindbodygreen.com/0-11265/the-3-biggest-downfalls-of-romantic-relationships-how-to-avoid-them.html

 

 

COSMIC ORGASM through TANTRA ~~

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COSMIC ORGASM through TANTRA ~~

Tantra first teaches how to move in sex, how to know it, how to feel it, how to come to the deepest shiva cosmic dance possibility hidden in it, to the climax, how to find the essential beauty, the essential happiness and bliss that is hidden there.
Once you know that secret you can transcend it because, really, in a deep sexual orgasm it is not sex which gives you bliss, it is something else. Sex is just a situation. Something else is giving you the euphoria, the ecstasy. That something else can be divided into three elements. But when I speak about those elements, do not think that you can understand them just from my words. They must become part of your experience. As concepts they are useless. Because of three basic elements in sex you come to a blissful moment.Those three are:

~Firstly, Timelessness

You transcend time completely. There is no time. You forget time completely; time ceases for you. Not that time ceases, it ceases for YOU; you are not in it. There is no past, no future. In this very moment, here and now, the whole existence is concentrated. This moment becomes the only real moment. If you can make this moment the only real moment without sex, then there is no need of sex. Through meditation it happens.

~Secondly, You Become Egoless

In sex for the first time you lose your ego. So all those who are very much egoistic, they are all always against sex, because in sex they have to lose their egos. You are not, nor is there the other. You and your beloved are both lost into something else. A new reality evolves, a new unit comes into existence in which the old two are lost – completely lost. The ego is afraid. You are no more there. If without sex you can come to a moment when you are not, then there is no need of it.

~Thirdly, the Unreal is Lost

In sex you are natural for the first time. The unreal is lost, the faces, the facades are lost; the society, the culture, the civilization, is lost. You are a part of nature. As trees are, as animals are, as stars are, you are a part of nature. You are in a greater something – the cosmos, the Tao. You are floating in it. You cannot even swim in it; YOU are not. You are just floating – being taken by the current.

These Three Things Give You the Ecstasy

Sex is just a situation in which it happens naturally. Once you know and once you can feel these elements, you can create these elements independently of sex. All meditation is essentially the experience of sex without sex, but you have to go through it. It must become part of your experience, not just be there as concepts, ideas, thoughts.
Tantra is not for sex, tantra is to transcend. But you can transcend only through experience – existential experience – not through ideology. Only through tantra does Brahmacharya happen. This looks paradoxical, but it is not. Only through knowledge does transcendence happen. Ignorance cannot help you towards transcendence; it can only help you towards hypocrisy.

~Osho – The Secret of Secrets, Vol.2 #10

http://www.satrakshita.be/cosmic_orgasm_through_tantra.htm

 

Revisiting Old Flames~

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Is it wise to revisit old flames from the past?

There is a practice out in the world that many of us consciously or sub-consciously do, and that is re-dating or reconnecting with old flames.

So what is re-dating/reconnecting? Re-dating or reconnecting is revisiting or “dating” someone you have been in a past relationship with. I’ve heard from many people that once a relationship is over, it is best to move forward and never look back. However, who can honestly predict their own future? Who can honestly predict what road they will wind up down in the future? Or situations that may present themselves to us?

Why do so many of us close the door on old flames from the past and lock the doors? Why do we do this when we have so much more to share and learn from them.

I’ve also heard to this phenomena referred to as the “saved by the bell” syndrome. Zack chases Kelly, Zack gets Kelly, then they break up only to date again…and then inevitably beak up again. Then, their paths even cross in college and they date! (Spoiler: they get married too.)

First, let me state that I am a firm believer in re-dating/reconnecting.

I feel by the responses of my friends and reactions from others that this is not a popular notion. So why do I so firmly stand behind this notion? It’s simple. When you reconnect with someone from your past, you already have that basis of chemistry, which, in random encounters with new people is much more difficult to find or navigate through.

You tend to open up more quickly and more deeply, and there is already some semblance of a foundation of trust. (Assuming the initial break up or drifting apart had nothing to do with trust issues.) There is a season and a reason for everything. Fire burns for a reason. It may be tempered but it never fully goes out.

Recently, I reconnected with an old flame as she was searching on social media for people to help her move. I had not spoken to her in a few years, and I decided “what the hell, I’m not busy that particular day and it would be interesting to catch up with her afterwards for a bit.” This eventually lead to one of the most amazing eight months of my life.

When we first met, we were in high school, we dated off and on for about a year and after high school our paths would occasionally cross randomly for short periods of time but we never got serious. We both are “wandering souls.” She is one of a few that I have had similar experiences with. We would randomly pop up in each other’s lives for obscure reasons, and connect for a bit, share for a bit, be intimate for a bit, and then move back on.

However, this one in particular most recently touched my soul deeper than any human had ever touched my soul in the 34 years I have been on this earth.

We talked every day. For hours on hours. Learning new aspects of our lives, sharing experiences we have been through over the time that lapsed since we last connected. We travelled together, she took me out of the country for the first time to a beautiful island in Mexico, Isla Mujeres, and I got my first passport stamp!

She taught me how to experience life through her eyes. Her eyes are beautiful. Her eyes are beautiful not just because of their appearance, because of what she sees. She preaches self-improvement, she pushes people to be honourable, to never settle and find meaning in your life. To live extreme, or “intensely” as she puts it. To learn something new each day, to let go of mistakes made when the day is done, to happy, but to be helpful, honest, loyal…in a nutshell, to be virtuous. To live a full filling life by finding happiness and by finding your true place in this world.

I’ve known this old flame for almost 20 years, and in all that time, I overlooked many of her views her views. Or she simply had not the life experience during those previous encounters to pass on her lessons to me. Luckily, I caught them this time around.

I helped her learn how to let her guard down and be soft and sexy again. I helped her rediscover the joys of physical intimacy that she felt she lost over a brief period of time. I helped her rediscover the trust that can be found in companionship and that its ok to let someone else take the wheel for a while. I helped her feel more comfortable taking risks and going with the flow and putting herself out there. I helped push her to be authentic and to loosen the anchors in life that tie us down.

We helped each other when we both needed help. Our souls found each other again and had so much more to offer and share with each other this time around. It’s was the right season and the right reason.

We taught each other a lot of new things from the experiences we gained by our interactions with others and the lives we led in between our paths crossing again. Our flame never extinguished, it just diminished until our paths crossed again this particular time.

These are all new things to me. Had I not said “yes” to helping her move, had I not said “yes” to the idea of reconnecting with this particular old flame, I would have missed out on so many amazing life lessons and life experiences. My soul would never have been touched so softly and intimately. I would have missed out on an amazing, in fact, one of the best emotional, physical and spiritual connection that has been right in front of me this whole time. I can’t speak for her but I know she is happy and knows what she is searching for now, she is in the process of her own new discoveries and experiences.

As with most things in life, our time together had to end. We are souls that wander from place to place, person to person. Our time for this crossing had come to a close.

I am eager to find someone new or to reconnect with someone else from my past and pay it forward to someone else in the same fashion I’m sure my most recent fling’s experiences led her to pay if forward to me. Perhaps our paths will cross again someday and we both will have new lessons to teach each other, and new experiences that we have picked up along our journey to share with each other. Or perhaps we will help each other rediscover the lessons we passed on from our most recent encounter.

Perhaps we are meant to be reminders of the lessons constantly teach each other. Our fire is never meant to extinguish, but to dampen from time to time, only to be reignited when our paths cross again.

I encourage people to keep all doors open. Never close a door for good. There is always some lesson in life to be learned. It may be a harsh truth, a beautiful reality, an experience or even a brutal heart breaking occurrence, but the point is that that is how we learn, that is how we grow, and what better way to learn and to grow than to keep the door open to those who know us best in the first place.

Those who know our strengths and weaknesses and who are in the best position to help us grow. We all must grow on our own, but reconnecting with old flames always carries a learning experience. It could also lead to an amazing experience, one that will catch you off guard and eager to continue on your path or find a new people or other old flames and pay the lessons you just learned forward.

Or maybe your new “reconnection” will be fate and a sign that you were always meant to be together but needed time to grow individually away from each other before that deeper level of connection can be made. I will always keep my door open to those who have shared intimate time with me. There are so many lessons to learn and so many lessons to pass on and I want to give, not deprive myself to any person who has or will cross my path.

I sometimes find myself searching so vigorously for connections in new people that I often forget or overlook that the fiercest fire, the hottest flame has already crossed my path. So often we dodge our old flames and avoid them when we should be open to communication and the possibility of reigniting that old flame, that old passion. There is a season and a reason for everything, and this includes those old flames from our past.

You never know what you might be missing out on by passing up an old flame. They certainly will be a new person with new experiences and lessons to share just as you are a new person with new experience and lessons to share.

I have reconnected with other old flames previously to my most recent experience and some were good, some were bad. Some reminded me how much I enjoyed their company, some reminded me why we diminished our flame in the first place. However, in all the previous encounters, we both learned something new from the other and about the other. Life is all about learning and growing and finding the best people and best ways to connect with people.

Never pour water on a fire that you have started with someone else. Never close the door.

It’s natural to move on and find new connections and share new experiences with new people but remember the lessons learned from your old flames. Keep your fires burning, your souls searching and you may just find that what you’ve been looking and yearning for has been right in front of you this whole time. Or you may learn a lesson from that old flame that helps you connect even more deeply with a new person.~~

~ Adam Wilkinson
http://www.elephantjournal.com/2015/07/the-value-in-re-dating-an-ex/


art: Franz von Stuck

The Fear of Sexuality~

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‘Slut’ is an extremely powerful word, isn’t it?

In four letters we have managed to encapsulate all of the shaming we, as humans, connect with female sexuality.

Of course the shaming of sexuality and sexual freedom is not reserved for just women. Society and culture have tried to control and dictate how we wish to love and our ability as men and women to choose what sort of sex we want.

Think of one of the main questions that guides our selection of partner and is a source of much conflict and insecurity. It has ended, and will continue to end relationships before they have even begun:

”How many people have you been with?”

As men and women, we can both feel the cringe if we’ve had a few “too many” sexual partners when this question pops up. It usually comes out of nowhere over a casual drink or during the post-coital cuddle… right when we thought everything was going soooooo great. Boom.

And we freeze. Why? Because this number carries a lot of weight and judgment.

The answer to this question is enough to say “No” to a wonderful and viable partner. A system taught someone – and those people taught us – that sexuality and our sexual freedom are reflective of our value systems and strength of character.

Amidst all this drama, do we ever really take the time to appreciate that falling for a beautiful heart is rare?!? And that no matter how that heart got in front of us, we should be appreciative?!? If there were a couple of questionable bangs on the way, is that enough to put the brakes on? We should acknowledge that just ONE tiny shift in their history and that person would not be sharing our gaze.

Wow. Deep. Shit.

“Oh wait, you’ve slept with more than seven people?! OMG. You’re basically a parking lot. I can’t date you. I can’t love you.”

If sexuality and sexual freedom brings our character into question, then what do we think about the many wise and amazing human beings who found themselves and learned their lessons through sexual exploration and being open-minded about making mistakes? Do these folks lack character? Does experience really make us wiser? Or is wisdom only reserved for wholesome choices that are approved by religion and the culture police?

This fear of sexuality has very much framed how we look at relationships and the stories we’ve been told about what is “right” and “wrong”.

The very nature of everything, I, and everyone else on this planet, are taught about relationships and love is a stretched and manipulated version of truths.

A little white lie won’t hurt anyone… right?! How about a lot of white lies?

Let me give you some examples:

• Monogamy is the only way

• You need to be married by 30

• You must have kids by 35 (women especially)

• Female sexual freedom is a HUGE NO-NO

• Gay marriage is bad

• Polyamory is shameful

• Every relationship needs to last forever, if they don’t, we are failures

• Divorce is bad

• Being in a relationship is more important than being happy and single

• Sexuality is bad. Discovering your sexuality is worse. And sharing your body with more than one person is immoral. Especially if you’re a woman.

And fear of sexual freedom underpins each and everyone of these beliefs. From the moment of conception, these beliefs are indoctrinated into us through media, religion and culture – all the source of much guilt and shame.

Isn’t it crazy that sex, the very thing that brought us into this world, is the thing we deny most?

And on top of that, we are so afraid of female sexual freedom that we have built systems around controlling it.

But what is the fear of embracing sex?

What is the fear of gay people falling in love and entering the union of marriage?

Is marriage really that sacred?

The divine heterosexuals who rule the institution of marriage are divorcing at a rate of 50% and even those who remain married are often addicted to pornography and are busy perusing the profiles of other married people on Ashley Maddison.

Now don’t get me wrong, marriage is a beautiful thing. There are plenty of people who are happily married, build amazing families, and have wonderful lives. Their lives and way of living are not the issue. I think a conscious partnership is amazing and I can’t wait to build a family with someone special.

The real problem stems from the Ivory Tower of the heterosexual marriage union that seems to be threatened by sexual freedom.

There’s a fear that families, religion, and society, will all come crumbling down around us should we embrace the sexuality born unto us as an innate human right.

It’s inevitable that systems will come crashing down which are built on the foundation of false truths.

The craziest part of the obsession to preserve this pretend world is that we have all been cheating the system and going behind its back anyways.

But it’s ok to cheat the system, isn’t it?! As long as no one is found out, right?

We’re told to hide our unmarried pregnant daughters from our so called “friends” and co-religionists because it will bring shame to the family.

We can’t tell our parents or family about the woman or man we’ve fallen in love with because she/he’s from a different culture or religion.

We reject our children because of their sexual orientation and we scoff at interracial marriage.

We would rather see two people who do not love each other get married to satisfy a system that does not allow them to love on their own terms.

We mutilate female genitalia and shame the feminine desire to explore THEIR bodies. THEIR BODIES! How ridiculous is that?!

All because of what?! To preserve a way of living that does not even embrace the very innate desire for sexual freedom and exploration? One that is not even built on love, kindness and acceptance.

This system seems doomed to fail, does it not?

bondage, slut, sex, relationship advice, dating advice, religion, sexuality

Our innate sexual desire is evident in our engagement of movies and media. The fanfare of “Fifty Shades of Grey” is not because we just like horrible writing and bad acting. It is because it represents our very deepest truth: EACH and EVERY ONE of us has a freak flag. And almost none of us let it fly.

So we become addicted to the porn movies where the (bad) actors are doing everything we wish we were doing.

Is there not a potential danger to ignoring our needs and hiding from our desires?

Absolutely. And the proof is all around us.

What do we think sexual repression manifests as? I don’t need to be a scientist to come to the conclusion that rape, aggression, molestation of children, and fetishes that are hidden in the corridors of Craigslist, are in some way related to the inability for us to just be ourselves.

We are all so afraid to just be who we are. We have bought into a system that is held together by the threat of shame.

Imagine if we all lived by the ACTUAL truth:

There is no one way to do anything. And anyone who claims to have it all figured out is the very person to run from.

Imagine if it was ok for everyone to not know and to search for knowledge through experience. Imagine if we just did the best we could, each and every day.

Imagine if we were told to just play, see, and feel.

To find out what works for US.

Imagine if our mistakes were embraced, and better yet, encouraged!

Imagine if we were taught that by finding out what we do not want it will just further reinforce what we DO want.

Imagine a world where we got to choose and that our choices did not have to be the same as everyone else’s.

That all of our decisions just need to be guided by our human capacity and desire to be kind. If every decision we made were based on the answer to the question:

“What would love do?”

I don’t know everything but I do know this:

You are the expert of you. You know you better than anyone. You know how you love. You know what feels good, and you know what your heart beats for.

You know what you want to try and what you are curious about.

You know what you seek. And the most beautiful thing of all, is that you are not committed to a life sentence because you made a decision when you did not know what you know today.

There is no “right way”. There is only your way. And no one knows your life better than you.

Live YOUR truth.~~

~Mark Groves

http://www.sexyconsciousawake.com/blog/maybe-we-all-need-to-be-a-little-more-slutty/

art: Roberto Ferri

Sex is Alchemy ~

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Everything in nature has a male and a female expression, such as in trees, fruits, animals, and also humans. In the human it is the feminine or negative side that is passive, but magnetic. It attracts to itself, it absorbs and stores potential energy. The male or positive side is electric or charged. When there is a union between the electric male and the magnetic female, the couple provides a conduit for cosmic force, which flows through them into the earth plane with tremendous power. This power radiated by them, polarises the surrounding atmosphere. The female at this time is surrounded by a corona of greenish-blue light. There is actually a powerful cosmic force surrounding us at all times that seeks expression through polarisation or sexual union. Therefore, because sex invokes a cosmic force it takes on a sacred meaning, as well as providing a vehicle for the incoming soul.
Sex cannot be treated as an exercise in eroticism with an orgasmic overtone. Sex, solely due to the abuse of it, has brought to humans disease, suffering and death. Basically, there is nothing wrong with sex. It is the human misinterpretation and misuse of sex that is wrong. For millions of people, sex is the only joy in life that they know. However, because the human is a self-contained universe, sex really brings two universes together to produce ~ by the holy process of reproduction ~ athird and so on ad infinitum. The main thrust of sex is to bring higher and higher souls into this world, and not to profane sex through lust and bring in lower and lower souls and sow the seeds of destruction in the world, such as we now see; humans wantonly killing one another.
In the man it is the feminine force that is passive and in the woman it is the masculine force that is passive, and before either one can be liberated these forces must be awakened. This is done through the near perfect union of soul to soul, mind to mind, and body to body, a true affinity. Thereby, a balance in the female magnetic and the male electric forces is affected. As a result of the merging of the magnetic and electric forces the two combined create an electromagnetic field of force that is all-encompassing. The all-absorbing female force field unites in perfect harmony with the dynamic and kinetic power of the male in near perfect union.
The energy generated through this male-female union is far greater than anything they can generate separately, because acting together they are able to draw to themselves agreat portion of the cosmic energy that exists around them. This in turn sets every atom into a higher vibration. Also at this time, because of the polarisation created around them, an impenetrable barrier to every form of evil that might approach or attack them is established.
Because there is a bio-electrical exchange of energy between two partners there is an intensification of sensitivity in the body, mind and soul. The body becomes sensual, the mind becomes more telepathic and the soul intuitional. This is also because the sexual union unlocks normally unused power. The universe itself is one indivisible matrix of cosmic force and this force is always seeking release or expression through a union of its opposite energies. So it seeks release in a couple who become a channel of discharge for this unique force.
Sex between two partners can take them to heaven or it can become hell, it can bestow greater health or it can cause disease and disability. Two right people together in love are one thing, but a wrong couple together is most certainly another thing. That which has the power to create also has the power to destroy. Partners must grow in sex the same as they grow in everything else in life.
A good healthy sexual relationship through the years of togetherness keeps each partner stimulated and charged, along with keeping them youthful. However, everything should be kept in balance. If the male is over-sexed he should not continually force his wife into a sexual relationship, because he can over-charge her and cause her to become a nervous wreck and to have violent outbreaks of anger. On the other hand, if the wife is too demanding sexually, she can wear the man out and drain the energy from him. Couples should, if possible, sleep together since this is beneficial to both, unless one of them is ill.
In humans it is the emotional contact between partners that is the prime force. There must be an emotional action and reaction between them before any bond is established. One person alone cannot forge such a bond. The other must respond to the emotion before any bond is extablished. If one person responds to the expression of emotion from another, then a bond is formed. And the continuity of the relationship endures as long as any emotion continues to be exchanged between a couple; and that may be love at first sight or love that grows as the relationship grows. Also, Karma may dictate the relationship as something from the past that has to be worked out. In this case, love may be missing, yet the relationship must be endured, albeit the emotional bond may be a negative one. You might say in a larger sense that it is karma that brings all people together, only some is negative karma instead of positive karma. So in the overall sense, marriages are made in heaven. That is, marriages are agreed upon before we arrive on this earth for this life.
In the final analysis, the highest sexual pleasure attainable is only a shadow of the bliss experienced through sexual energy converted into creative power. Sexual energy is the link between the material world and the spiritual. It helps the human spirit to be born into a material body. Later on it helps the human in his efforts to grow spiritually by using sexual energy as the means to stimulate and raise his consciousness to the divine cosmic awareness.
~Charles Lutes

Sexual Energy is the Energy of Life~

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Freely Express your Sensual and Sexual Self

Your sexual energy is the energy of life. You are a sexual being created from sexual energy. If you are not comfortable experiencing pleasurable sexual sensations, you are strangling your energy channels. That is why your desires have difficulty manifesting. The more you experience those exotic erotic feelings within you, the more your body’s energy will open up and allow you to naturally experience higher levels of health, creativity, productivity, freedom, abundance, happiness and enjoyment in life.

Allow yourself to experience yourself as an alive sensual and sexual being all day long. Let the sensual and sexual energy flow throughout your entire body. By letting yourself explore these sensual and sexual feelings anytime they arise, in any circumstance of situation, you gain the ultimate sense of freedom. Sexual freedom is a state of permission, which has been insanely suppressed all around the world. When you are sensually alive, there is an enjoyable exploration of your entire body.

Sexual freedom is what we all want, every person wants to be sexually liberated. It is to be the sensual and sexual being that you are. It is to look into members of the opposite sex with the message that you could greatly please them sexually, to show them that you could cause them to have great feelings of enjoyment, excitement and satisfaction. When others can feel there’s so much to gain by being with you through the sensual and fun loving nature you project, they will be irresistibly drawn to you.

~ Enoch Tan